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Varada Sharma

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Mere Kanha {and a tutorial}

It’s been over a year that I’d been searching for (read pestering Mr. C for) an idol of my Kanha. I wanted him to be playing his flute. I wanted him to have a cow besides him. I wanted an idol whom I can decorate – make jewellery and stuff – just like I will when I’ll actually meet my Kanhaji. That’s the picture I had in my mind. I saw an idol somewhat like that a couple years ago, but for some reason could not take him with me.

When I came to Nashville all by myself, thousands of miles away from my home and family I still carried this picture with me in my heart.

Call me silly, but I often have heart to heart conversations with my Kanhaji. Whenever I feel lonely I talk to him. Whenever I am happy, I rejoice with him. If anything bothers me, I take my complaints to him. When something extraordinarily nice happens, I thank him. He also loves me like no other. He takes care of anything that is bothering me – from honey and lemon juice to a new microwave. He watches over me, provides for me. From unexpected help when I desperately need it to some secret message only I can make sense of. We are tied together in a way no one but me and him can understand. Beyond words. Beyond reason.

Ever since I came to Nashville, I have been mainly talking to him about taking care of my little ones who are far away at the moment. Of my parents, family, friends, everyone. I’ve also been asking him to come and be with me.

Guess what? In the Indian store where we go to buy groceries, I found him! An idol just like the one I wanted. First I was excited. Then I thought, may be I should take him only when I make my own home in this place. Some days passed and I just could not get his image off my mind. So I just went ahead and brought him home -  my temporary home for now, but at least we are together. In form.